Let’s begin by acknowledging “is pornography biblical grounds for divorce?” is either a heart-wrenching or awkward question to ask. If you are reading this article, it is either because your world has been turned upside down by the issue or because you have been called on to help someone try to put their world back together. This is not light reading and you cannot read with a light heart.
Even before we begin to examine the subject, let’s consider the large number of issues that domino from either answer: children’s futures, attorneys, finances, embarrassment, dignity, trust, endless questions about motives, tip-of-the-iceberg fears about other sexual activity, the long road of restoration if we work on the marriage, how can I discern true repentance, “you said you would change before,” and many other concerns. Neither answer is easy (marital restoration or divorce), or really even easier.
With that being said, it is wise to pause at this point in the article and pray. Pray for God to give you the ability to focus while reading (and not start having hypothetical conversations with your spouse or friend you are helping). Pray for the ability not to attack your spouse with what you read when it affirms your hurts/fears and for the ability not to attack what you read when it challenges you. Pray that this article would guide you to a wise, God-honoring decision in the midst of a situation where right answers will not result in easy paths or immediate confirmations of a good choice.
To read the entire article click here: BLOG_porn&divorce_BCH (PDF)
Brad, I appreciate your heart on this matter. However typical the circumstances unpacked in your article may be, there is a growing number of instances where the wife is the offending party. I personally find little help across the vast array of articles on this subject which we have such pervasive access to thanks to the internet. Those which deal primarily with the emotional, visual, or physical unfaithfulness committed by wives are so few… And I am left struggling to lift up the heads of broken men.
Thankfully, God is faithful and provides Himself when I’ve got nothing.
I would recommend you read “Dirty Girls”, an article by Anne Jackson at flowerdust.net
I agree with your assessment. The focal point of this article is not meant to imply that women do not struggle with pornography (visual infidelity) or emotional infidelity through forums such as Facebook, chatrooms, or other on-line forums. I appreciate your comment.